Apr 10 2019
THIS STARTUP WAITED FOR 6 YEARS TO OFFER FREE VERSION AND ANOTHER 2 YEARS BEFORE THEY TOOK OUTSIDE FUNDING.
THE GRAMMARLY WAY.Start-ups today look for growth and expansion in the least amount of time possible. The most common tactic that everyone use (we can bet!) is by offering the free service to increase their user base. Business gurus believe in making users get the hang of their product or service by cheap – viral offers. Once they get used to it they eventually convert into their paid customers. Many have succeeded with this formula though.
Some facts about Grammarly first:1. Grammarly was launched in 2009.2. The company started under the name of SentenceWorks, which they soon abandoned.3. This startup waited for 6 years to offer free version for their premium services.4. They next waited for 2 years before they took any outside funding.5. Grammarly has 20 million daily active users. (In 2015 there were 1 million users.)6. The proofreading resources at Grammarly check the content against 250 grammar rules.7. Grammarly tops YouTube’s TrueView for Action 2018 leaderboard.Achieving 20 million daily active users and $115 million investment led by General Catalyst is a big feat. The Grammarly team placed its focus on one core value – ‘helping people communicate better wherever they write online on a daily basis’.When making a marketing pitch if you drop Artificial Intelligence (AI) and Machine Learning (ML) terms into it, the chances of selling the products increases by many folds. These two terms catch the eyeballs and work as a crowd puller. Grammarly team didn’t give these 2 sellable techie terms much footage, rather they began working from the natural language processing and then towards machine learning.
How it all started?If you have anything related to writing, communications, school paper, business document or social media post, you know what Grammarly is and we are pretty sure you have used it. Our first experience of Grammarly was with the free Google Chrome browser extension.They started in 2009 with a premium product for Universities. They earned money while improving their product and expanding its consumer market. Before in 2011, when Grammarly decided to go freemium, it was already a successful and profitable with million users.
Lessons we learned from Grammarly model
1. Transport your product to where your customers are.What normally happens is, companies build the product and assume users will come to them. The focus is on technical capacities rather than meticulously prepared revenue plan.What Grammarly focused on building a great product and baked into distribution. They didn’t burn their energies in being the best web application. That would have ended up being an extra layer on top of major giants Microsoft Office and Google Docs. It was easy for these giants to up the game and help people by not making them pay $12 a month for Grammarly services. Grammarly smartly introduced itself as a chrome extension. Now users were checking everything they were writing on the internet.
2. Compound wins over everythingGrowth Hacking, big launch, fat funding, guerilla marketing they all make good stories. Little do these one time hit stories make a sustainable business. Grammarly used limited online channels, thanks to a small team, for marketing. They made double metrics in customer acquisition and revenue each year. These small incremental wins as they compound over time.
3. Develop your business modelThis we have established earlier in this article. Many SaaS companies in their intital phase, focus on selling to other startups to spread the word and drive growth. They later move to upmarket for revenue and bigger contracts.In total contrast, first sold its premium product, improvise it parallelly and then launched the freemium model to the public.
Moral of the storyWith a self-funded product, you know that you don’t surplus funds to invest in. You ought to sign up paying customers as soon as possible to avoid burning out.The management worked smartly. This startup waited for 6 years to offer free version of their premium services, a perfect strategy to make a sale first, be sustainable and then grow gradually.PS: Grammarly app is also available for your smartphones. You can download the app from the store.PSS: We wrote this complete blog on Grammarly.How dependent you are on Grammarly?
Feb 11 2019
Facebook will tell who uploaded your contact information for ads by updating ‘Why I am seeing this ad?’.
Facebook is making mends and extending its hands to be your friends again.
Don’t be still mad at it. Facebook has had its share of flak of selling your contact details and making money from it! From the recent news, Facebook is making it easier for you to know how your personal information changes hands for ad targeting. According to TechCrunch it will start from February 28, 2019.
In the next couple of days, Facebook will be updating the feature ‘Why I am seeing this ad?’ Earlier when you check this feature, the Facebook interface only showed details about the brand that purchased the ad and basic demographic targeting details. Now it will also reveal if anyone has uploaded your contact info that made you see the sales pitch a.k.a ad. Yes, you will know if the source was a retailer or any company who outsourced to gather data.
Lets. see how are the ads showing up on our feed now. This particular example is for the Facebook product – Workplace. We simply clicked the three dots on the right corner and go to the option in the end ‘Why am I seeing this ad?‘
Once you click, you will see a screen similar like this:
The reason we are able to see this ad or it pop-ups on my feed is because of the target audience they set with Interest and Age. Clearly, we are Facebook consumer and we are aged above 25 years residing in India. Now in case you do not want to see any more ads like this, you can anytime go to Options button and select an appropriate option for you.
In another example here, this ad by some business from the education industry.
And, if you see here, the reason this ad appears on our feed is that at some point we might have visited their website or an app. They are smart and they have installed Facebook Pixel on their website/app, from where they can target more people through retargeting ads. Another thing to notice, since the ad is to get admission in an MBA college through GMAT score, the company has calculated the most popular age group who usually applies for their MBA program.
Yes, we said that Facebook wants to be friends again. It is not as transparent as we all demand it to be, we do think that this is in the right direction. This feature update will not completely stop the misuse, but at least the ad sponsors can get penalized for using your contacts without consent. This will put pressure on companies to think twice before harvesting customer information without permission.
We will be updating this blog post February 28, once we start getting ads and their source (that we want to catch right!) So stay tuned. In case you need to be posted on the update, leave us a comment, we will send you a direct link.
Till then, work on your spy powers and simultaneously crack the art of Facebook ad targetting.
PS: We also have 15 class advance program to learn Facebook Advertisements and building sales funnels that generate revenue for you, instead of drowning your money. To book your class or know more get in touch with us here.
Jan 18 2019
This was not so Cool with Amul
Imagine coming across your fake account.
Angry, are you?
Now imagine that fake account asking people money lakhs of rupees, in tour name.
This won’t look as much scary as it is for Amul.
Yes, our own beloved Amul, Taste of India is under stress for a fraud case happened due to identity theft.
Thankfully you haven’t seen such nightmare, unlike those people who were trapped in the web of Fake Amul Distributorship. What was it? Let’s explore.
Amul is a popular trusted brand, a successful business represented and adored by the girl who refuses to age. Some malicious minded people took the advantage and allegedly planned a fraud against Amul.
According to Amul, a disturbing element, which has still not been found out whether an individual or any company, had a thought to run a paid advertisement on Google based on keywords like, ‘Amul Franchisee’, ‘Amul Parlor’ and ‘Amul Distributor’. Many people fell in this trap, assuming that the ad shown was running by our own trusted Amul. When a person clicks on the ad, the link takes them to a fake website claiming to be Amul. The website has a sale page that asks people to fill a registration form.
Once the ‘lead was generated’ by the scammers, they give a call to the person and ask to deposit amount ranging from 25,000/- to 3 Lakh/- in various bank accounts. Believing this was Amul and it will be a good investment, people did. Not one but many fell in this trap.
Amul has sent a legal notice to Google stating this issue of Fraudulent Amul Franchise Advertisements. Seeking a full stop on this fraud. Apart from contacting Google India Amul also filed a complaint in the Police Department. According to the news reported by Economic Times, Amul has reported their concern to Google back in September 2018.
The Internet is powerful and so is the art of disguise. We at SillySense will request you to be aware of frauds happening and suggest to do your due diligence before paying or committing to anyone on the internet.
Jan 03 2019
Whatsapp has been a BFF for most of us. Either we use it for our personal chit-chatting or we build an entire communication channel through groups for our work. Whatsapp is our stable bet!
It is still ruling all the charts for the most popular app on entire smartphone, tablets and web universe. They are coming up with a few new features in 2019 that would be rolled out you as well.
Just scrolling through the news feed we found out some really cool new features list that we thought might interest you.
Feature 1: Fingerprint
Privacy on Personal chats is something that everybody wants. Screenlock, app lock etc is all there but an extra layer of protection won’t hurt. Shhh.. things can be too personal and too dangerous if get exposed.
WhatsApp has its own security measures in which it gives an option to secure your WhatsApp with a pattern. Soon it will provide us with an option of fingerprint security. Ah, and you don’t worry thinking about what if it doesn’t work, in case your fingerprint fails to match due to some reasons you always have an option to enter your WhatsApp by entering your phone’s screen lock pattern.
Feature 2: Dark Mode
A much wanted for all night owls, who prefer to push all the communications at night so that they can focus on their day.
WhatsApp’s new feature will be about selecting a dark theme, not only to just look cool but also to give your eyes a little less strain and a bit more relaxation. The dark background on the screen will also help you to save much battery and won’t be the cause of your headaches.
Feature 3: Consecutive Voice Messages
Are you more of a verbal person who prefers talking over typing? And you get annoyed when playing all the bite-sized voice messages one after the other?
WhatsApp has got a gift for you. It is the end of the extra tasks that you have to do .. take your finger to the screen and hit play again and again.
After this update, all you have to do is to press the play button of the voice notes and you can listen to them in a row one by one. All the consecutive voice notes just by pressing the one and rest of the following will be played by themselves. A real life changing update, isn’t it? Tell us in comments how much you wished for it.
Feature 4: Media Preview
A new message received and previews say “Image”, that’s all.
Now you have to open the whole app and see if it is your interest or not? When the new set of features will roll out, you can then see the preview on your notification window and you can ignore it at your convenience.
Feature 5: Contact Ranking
WhatsApp presented the Picture-in-Picture mode in 2019 for playing videos. The element enabled users to see shared recordings from YouTube and Facebook specifically in the application on a little coasting window. Clients could talk out of sight while getting a charge out of the video all the while. This year, any outsider video as mp4 documents shared by clients will have the capacity to use this component also.
Thank you WhatsApp for the above-mentioned updates we will be eager to try them once they are out. We have requests of our own and need your attention. It’s been such a long time using the app that we need some more features available like ASAP! We promise we are only requesting features based on their utility.
Top 5 feature requests on WhatsApp in 2019
Request 1: Groups Tab
WhatsApp is heavily used for chats, calls and status updates thus these are available on the upper tabs of the application.
There are more than 1 billion WhatsApp groups. On average an active WhatsApp user must be a part of 10 groups. We believe it’s time WhatsApp should have the 4th tab on top for “Groups”
Request 2: Bio should be clickable
Thank you for making links work in status, if WhatsApp Profile bio can be clickable it will be great. We don’t see it will create any chaos or spam on the network.
Request 3: No addition info for Multiple Messages Select – Copy – Paste
Recall that friend who talks through multiple messages. Hitting enter is their favourite hobby. Now, if you have to copy them all, additional information like name of the contact you saved, phone number and time stamp also get copied. It is an additional task to go and delete extra info from every message copied.
This is a real problem than playing consecutive voice messages or previewing media in the notification window.
Request 4: Seeking permission from the user before joining the grouP
Though WhatsApp groups are powerful the biggest fall back is as a user we are intimated about joining the group when someone already has added us. Seeking permission from us a user can be so stressfree and save us from unsolicited messaging.
Request 5: Selective Read Receipts
We turn off our read receipts in order to save ourselves from “why you haven’t replied yet” drama. Clearly, it is difficult to explain to the masses that we are not obliged to respond to all messages right then and there. The problem with turning them off is we don’t get to know who has seen our status update which is actually available for public (people who are not added in the contacts).
A selective read receipt option will be a saviour.
Let us know what are your requests from WhatsApp in the comments below. In case you agree with ours please share with your friends, who knows we might reach the right people who can make it happen.
Jun 03 2018
Social media platforms are constantly getting updated. The moment you find yourself comfortable with the algorithm update, something again changes or introduced into the system. The month of May was really happening for social media platforms, here are the 11 social media news you should know.
Instagram – You can mute now!
Instagram has finally added a mute button, allowing you to ignore people without offending them. The new feature will finally allow you to banish selected accounts from your newsfeed – but without the person behind that account actually knowing. Some time back, the option to mute people’s stories was introduced – meaning stories from selected accounts would not show up at the top of the app but were still available from their profiles.
Instagram – Testing song stickers on stories.
Instagram is preparing to let you add music to your Stories. “Music stickers” could let you search for and add a song to your posts, thanks to licensing deals with the major record labels recently struck by Facebook. Instagram is also testing a way to automatically detect a song you’re listening to and display the artist and song title as just a visual label.
Listenable music stickers would make Instagram Stories much more interesting to watch. Amateur video footage suddenly looks like DIY MTV when you add the right score. The feature could also steal thunder from teen lip syncing app sensation Musically.
Instagram – Ads for existing posts can be run through Power Editor or Ads Manager.
Previously, the only way to run an organic post as an ad was by using the in-app “Promote” button – Instagram’s equivalent of Facebook’s “Boost” button. But now, Facebook is rolling out the feature that we’ve all been waiting for!
The feature, currently rolling out to “all global advertisers” within “next few weeks” will be available for the Brand Awareness, Post Engagement, Reach, and Video Views objectives, and will be available in “auction buying” in both Ads Manager and Power Editor. Don’t get too excited though, you will only be able to create an ad from Single Video and Single Photo Feed Posts for now. Carousel, Stories, Branded Content, and Instagram Shopping posts are not supported.
Facebook – Reopens app reviews on the platform.
Onstage at Facebook’s developer conference, Mark Zuckerberg announced that the company will be re-opening its app review process following the pause it took in the aftermath of the Cambridge Analytica crisis.
This is certainly a welcome news for developers who build on the platform. They had to deal with Facebook making major changes without their input as the company has tried to navigate its latest scandals.
Facebook Analytics – New app for Analytics tool
Facebook wants to prove it can earn businesses money, not just build their social media audience. Facebook analytics app touts the ability to “stay on top of your growth, engagement, and conversion efforts on the go. Easily view key metrics and reports, check automated insights, and receive notifications when changes occur.”
The Facebook Analytics app lets users create custom mobile views of their most important metrics like revenue, retention, demographics and active users. It ties into Facebook’s web Analytics suite to let you view funnels, cohorts and segments you’ve created there.
Facebook – Testing New Search Engine for Influencer Marketing
The Branded Content Matching search engine lets marketers choose influencers based on characteristics of creators’ fans and see stats about their audiences.
Facebook – preparing to launch a dating feature.
Zuckerberg announced that Facebook app will introduce dating feature. This has been trolled ruthlessly on twitter. We at SillySense think it is a good news. Now how long it will keep on sending ‘frandship requests’. Time to grow up!
Whats App – Group video calling feature introduced.
What’s App is the single favourite app the world loves for chatting. The only thing missing here is group video chat (the reason we still go back to Skype). Facebook has revealed that Whats App is adding a group video calling feature in the months ahead. There aren’t many details at this stage, but it’s clear the feature will allow four participants and work with smartphones.
Stickers are coming, too.
Whats App – Enables In – app Facebook and Instagram Video Viewing.
Whats App has added support for playing Instagram and Facebook videos within the app. Now when contacts send you Facebook and Instagram videos, you can watch them inside Whats App without having to exit your conversation thread and go into other apps. The app already allowed users to play YouTube videos within the conversation. This feature is currently being available only for iOS users.
Whats App – Features for group chat
Whats App has rolled out an update and this will change how you use groups. We can already sense many group admins taking a sigh of relief.
a) Group description feature is updated. Now you can add more to the description (512 characters long) or add a topic to the group so that the group members know what the group is about.
b) You can now search a participant in a group.
c) You can easily switch from a voice call to video call by the tap of a button.
d) You can now leave a group permanently to avoid being repeatedly added back after you have left.
e )Administrators can no longer be removed from a group they created.
LinkedIn – 3 new lead generation forms introduced for ads.
LinkedIn Lead Gen Forms eliminate one of the major obstacles to conversions—relying on users to fill out contact forms, which is even more difficult on mobile devices—by auto-populating an in-application form with information from users’ LinkedIn profiles and allowing them to instantly submit those forms.
The forms updated are – Lead Gen Forms for Sponsored InMail, option to add custom questions, and Lead Gen format for Dynamic Ads.
Be updated with your social media game with us. Let us know which feature you are eagerly waiting for.
Apr 27 2017
For those little fashionistas in us, there is some great news. The 8th season of India Runaway Week is happening in Delhi and starting from April 28, 2017. Make your weekend plans because no matter how big the India Runway Week gets, there you will always find fresh new names and lot more fresh swag. And yes, of course, the old designers that we can’t stop going gaga over will continue this season too.
This year theme: Weavers at Centre Stage on 8th season of India Runaway week.Date- 28th- 30th April 2017Venue- Thyagraj Stadium, New Delhi.
The weavers of India are its biggest assets. Indian hand woven fabrics are popular all over the world and they have been known since time immemorial. India was exporting textiles to most parts of the civilized world in ancient times but throughout history and in the current situation, there is evidence that shows that weavers have always been a victim of a staunch hierarchical system. Being at the bottom of the system they fall prey to the extreme forms of exploitation.
To raise voice for weavers and generating livelihood for hundreds of such rural artisans there are some identified organizations who promise to take an effective step. These organizations made a significant contribution to the lives of the artisans especially women who are working with it. They are geared up to help and improve weaver’s economic as well as social status.
Indian Federation for fashion Development has joined hand with four of these organizations i.e Rangsutra, SoCHE, Banka Silk, and Gestures by Kriti who will present the work of artisans at current season of India Runway Week Summer 2017 ramp which is starting from 28th of April to 30th of April 2017. These identified organizations strive to bring the traditions of India to customers all around the world with its unique creations and products. It not only helps its artisans become wage earners but also spreads awareness about the traditional crafts of the region, thus helping preserve a rich part of India’s national cultural heritage.
“The purpose of this show is to raise the current conditions of the weavers and to propose the importance of such organizations and social security to the custodians of this ageless art.” Said by Fashion director, Kiran Kheva, India Runway Week
Rangsutra is a craft company of thousand artisans from remote regions of India – the desert regions of Rajasthan and plains of Eastern Uttar Pradesh whereas SoCHE is reviving this languishing and less popular hand embroidery practiced by women around the border areas of Barmer. Banka Silk on other hand is imparting the required skills to the weaver’s community of Banka, connecting them with the markets and helps create an Eco-system wherein the weaver’s community can become self-sustainable. And lastly Gestures by Kriti is a livelihood support and outreach initiative that began in 1999, to promote ethical, sustainable and socially conscious thinking & buying of ‘community made’ products.
Apr 19 2017
Vivo, the title sponsor of Twenty20 Indian Premier League since last year, launches its V5 Plus limited edition Matte Black smartphone to celebrate 10 years of IPL. VIVO and IPL aim at achieving the highest of standards through this product that has already created ripples in the market, thanks to its already attractive features. It is exclusively made to glorify the spirit of cricket in India. As we all know that Cricket in India is not just seen as a sport but is observed as a deity and celebrated as a festival. In a country like ours, a phone that is wholeheartedly made to celebrate and honour our favourite sport, also honouring our enthusiasm is sure to win hearts.
The matte black V5 Plus smart phone sports the VIVOIPL logo as the token celebration of ten years of the pure craziness of IPL spirit. This, apart from other attractive features, is sure to attract a lot of attention from the cricket crazy world. It is a joint effort of VIVO and IPL to give the best possible experience to the cricket crazy audience. The phone has attracted a lot of attention for its high-quality music and the first ever dual front facing camera give the perfect selfie experience. This makes it the best selfie-taking phone among all the others. It has a primary front camera of 20 MP and a secondary camera of 8 MP. Apart from having all other features and filters that the other phones have, it is known for the Bokeh feature. The two front-facing lenses make it possible to click a high quality and sharp focussed selfie with a blurred background. The focus and blurriness could be adjusted by simply changing the aperture. It is user-friendly and makes sure to click the best ever selfie.
The phone looks sleek and light but it is definitely not to be confused with being fragile, as it is equipped with a gorilla glass by Corning that makes it strong and keeps it safe from any damage. It is equipped with the Qualcomm Snapdragon 625 octa- core CPU, which allows it to execute instructions making the multi-tasking efficient and easier. It uses the best available 4G LTE network for faster and easier communication. The 3055 mAh battery ensures its long battery backup. It runs on Funtouch OS 3.0 Operating system based on Android 6.0. It is built in 4G LTE network for high-speed wireless communication.
The wait for the cricket fans is over. They can reach out to Flipkart, any of the Vivo stores, or any modern trade outlets around the country. The matte black V5 plus limited edition smartphone will be available from April 10th onwards for Rs. 25,990, which definitely is a great deal for this amazing premium smartphone.
Feb 25 2017
Whats app status update. Yay ya nay?
Why o why whats app what has happened to you?
So the Twitterati has enjoyed a full day of making jokes about how Mark Zuckerburg is going after snapchat. Clearly, the mass is not happy with this new what’s app status update.
Why do we have so many social media platforms? Because we love the variety and wish to keep few things away from few people. It is popularly said that Snapchat is for teens. Instagram is for adults and what’s app is for parents.
When snapchat stories first came out, people (teens or the happening 20s) went out crazy. Putting everything on their snapchat stories and for the rest of the world, fortunately, it was a blessing. Now the bulk of food pictures, coffee shots, peppy inspiring messages, running records, currently playing music and gyming show-offs were moved from mainstream social media to a much secretive and fragile platform which scraps off everything in 24 hours. Not a bad hangover of superficial awesome life !!
Then came the Instagram stories. First, it was criticised in the way that Instagram is copying features as it is from snapchat. Then eventually (just in few days, *surprise*) everyone settled in and the party continues on Instagram but yes a check in here and there on snapchat was fun.
The reasons were obvious:
a) People already have worked hard to gain followers on snapchat. (Gaining snapchat followers is the toughest, there we said it.)
b) Snapchat camera and filters, face swap options were great. On the other hand, Instagram allows it’s users to upload pictures and videos in their stories.In all laziness it worked well with snapchat users. They kept their snapchat live and upload the stories again on Instagram. They also upload them on twitter and enjoy the stardom.
c) Maintaining Instagram profile is easier. Post videos, boomerang fun clips, selfies, vanity filters, stories, geo-tagging in stories, tagging friends in stories, the number of followers, contact information, one link in the bio, Direct messaging, hashtags and geotags …. all in one place.
Facebook’s fb live video feature was well received by the users. These fb live videos were the most profitable in terms of organic traffic, at the times when facebook is working on paid marketing.
Whats app is mainly used for the instant communication, group messaging (and marketing groups), sending current location, calling overseas, and spamming with unfiltered forwards. Isn’t it enough? Whats app status update was not demanded.
We at sillysense believe that whats app is a very strong and quick medium for independent communications. Bringing stories to whats app is like launching internet’s latest fad-wala- junkyard at a new place. We give it big thumbs down and really hoping it doesn’t get big. There should be a calm place, no?
Let us know your views on whats app status update.
Oct 16 2016
What makes a woman, a woman?
‘A woman is a human who is generous, full of compassion, affection; possess grace with lots of patience. She has a strong will power.’
How a man can’t be defined with these characteristics?
‘Well yes, but woman is associated with everything that is love.’
But still, why you call someone a woman?
‘Man and a woman have different anatomies. A Woman is called a woman because she creates new life. She gives birth.’
What if she can’t?
(poker face, don’t know the answer)
If she can’t give a birth, she is not a woman?
(still searching for the answer)
This week, I put people around me in a situation where they responded in the way, you just read.
A Woman, or a female of the species, is someone who carries a child in her womb and gives birth. Man or a male who gives sperm for the reproduction process. What if a man or a woman for any given reason is not capable to reproduce?
Infertility is considered as a taboo. It is as hurting for a man as for a woman. When we are living in a society where it’s a habit of encroaching somebody’s personal problem and brutally trolling them in public that it actually becomes a curse for them, one can imagine how abusive it can go for women.
Women who are infertile are considered inauspicious and not allowed to perform certain rituals. Many times they are not welcomed at celebrations and festivities in families, in the fear that their presence will bring bad luck to the host family. Why are infertile men not treated this way? Why no one stops socializing and chuck them out of the society as any infertile woman is subjected to? This is a bizarre thing to not invite a woman who can’t have a baby (and in many cases who doesn’t want to have a baby at that phase of her life) to a baby shower ceremony. A female doesn’t get pregnant or lose her ability to get pregnant by touch or presence of some person in the room or the house!
The focus here is not to compare as who is treated how, the pain they are going through is same, whether being a man or a woman. It’s a personal issue; problem arises when others start making it a big deal and go on to label the woman as ‘Banjh’
It’s a personal issue; problem arises when others start making it a big deal and go on to label the woman as ‘Banjh’
Infertility is a disease
A human body has many systems that make it function and work properly. Digestive system, Circulatory System, Endocrine system, Exocrine system, Immune system, Skeleton system, Nervous system, Urinary system, Respiratory system and Reproduction system. If any system does not work the way it is meant to be, we call it as a disability or a disease.
We take care of blind people, physically handicap, people who are going through depression and various other ailments. Unfortunately, people who have medical problems with their reproduction system are chucked out from the society instead of helping them. I look for a logical reason and found none.
If a person who is not able to speak, hear or see things due to their disability is not put down as ‘bringing disgrace’ to their family, then how a woman who is not fertile can be cornered like that. Till the time we educate our own society against this prejudice, that infertility is a disease, not a curse, we inadvertently add misery to a woman’s (and in some cases a man’s) life. These women have already lost their mental peace, confidence, some relationships and a huge amount of money in treatments, isn’t it enough?
I look for a logical reason and found none.
A woman’s nightmare
I met this lady who has just turned 38, some days back. She is married for 6 years and is now in dilemma. She wants to have a baby but at the same time is no rush for now. Her husband is quite okay with this, in fact, they together took this decision. They do not want a baby till last year because of their professional struggle and financial crunch. Now they are trying but not that desperate. Her doubt is, as her biological clock is ticking and if she is not able to conceive, her husband may leave her and marry someone else.
Theirs is a love marriage. During this sensitive discussion, while she was opening up and sharing her fears and dilemmas, I was thinking it’s all in her head and nothing of this intensity is going to happen. Now, my rational mind backed this thought. They both have not met any doctor. They do not know the issue if there is any and with whom. It might be not their right alignment with the time to have a baby.
It was difficult to sleep that night. Her question kept bothering me ‘my husband may leave me, to marry someone else.’ They were not trying earlier because of both of their financial insecurity. If they need a treatment and they delayed it for some reason, how is it her fault? Why she will be shown out the doors?
How a woman becomes ‘not a good wife’ if she can’t deliver a baby?
I understand when one decide to end the marriage on grounds of infidelity, compatibility, lack of love, cruelty etc. What I don’t understand is after so many years of marriage one decides to divorce the partner because they cannot produce a baby. How can a relationship break over not having a child? Does she stop loving and supporting her husband? Does she stops taking responsibilities of a wife and daughter in law? Does she stops being the kind of sane person she used to be? Does she become inhuman? She remains the same. She can be going through depression, partly because she is upset with herself, partly because of the treatment of the society. All she needs is a support not isolation.
Solutions and Scars
Our medical sciences have advanced so much and now there are many treatments that a woman can undertake to be able to have a baby (other than suggested fasts and rituals by the society). All these methods are extremely painful and horribly expensive. One can take years and years to respond to them and results are not always guaranteed. Both husband and wife get drained themselves and deplete all their savings in the hope. They are already going through a lot. We as a society should take the responsibility of not taunting them all this while #InfertilityIsNotATaboo .It is plain simple medical problem and the couple is already taking treatment for that.
If nothing works, adoption is also a solution. What more beautiful can be, to be parents to someone who needs them. Unfortunately, adoption is also scrutinized by some in society. They go one labeling the woman as ‘banjh’ and abusive titles for the child.
Adoption is a personal choice. A woman may not want to give birth, it’s her choice. In any situation, her motherly feelings are not lost. She will play with kids, love them the same way. Motherhood is experiencing or raising a child. Infertility has nothing to do with behavior, likes, dislikes and emotions. She is still a woman if she can’t give birth.
So I finally ask again
What makes a woman, a woman?
This blog is to #SpreadAwareness about Infertility through Infertility Dost, India’s first website that facilitates couples to brave infertility with support and knowledge. You can find other links on Write Tribe
Sep 19 2016
On September 18, 2016, an Indian Army brigade, located at Uri in Jammu and Kashmir was attacked by armed militants. After the long battle, four of them were confirmed killed, but unfortunately, 17 lives of Indian Soldiers were also claimed. This is said to be the deadliest attack in North India region in recent years.
India is respectfully known as a peaceful nation. The one who is always willing to sit down, discuss and solve the issues without going the war way. But this time, the mood of the nation is just not to condemn this situation.
See how Twitter India has reacted on #UriAttacks
Gautam Gambhir, Cricketer
My worry is dat our leaders can neither control d mosquitoes which r within d nation nor which cme frm acros d border. Pathetic. #UriAttacks
— Gautam Gambhir (@GautamGambhir) September 19, 2016
Ajay Devgun, Actor – Director – Producer
Not 17 families, 1 family – India, enough is enough! #UriAttacks
— Ajay Devgn (@ajaydevgn) September 19, 2016
How general public is reacting !!
— प्रशांत द्विवेदी (@IAm_PKD) September 19, 2016
— Samarjit Das (@jitsamar14) September 19, 2016
Some are furious and demand an action.
Looking forward for some actions apart from being CondemNATION condemning all the time.#UriAttacks
— Suman Saha 🇮🇳 (@MSumanSaha) September 19, 2016
It’s high time to adopt zero tolerance policy like Israel. #UriAttacks
— शरद कुमार श्रीवास्तव (@SrdShri) September 19, 2016
Some were able to find a coincidence…
— Abhilasha Chaturvedi (@chaturvedigunnu) September 18, 2016
Lastly, at SillySense, we wish this time everyone should come together and react like a – NATION
Let’s be a nation this time.
Let’s not be from some religion, caste, state, quota etc etc
Let’s show our anger together.
Let’s not just condemn.
They were our soldiers.
They were there to protect us.
They were Indians.
They were our nation.
Let’s raise our voice.
Let’s demand an action.
Let’s make some noise.
Let’s force government take concrete action.
Let’s do this, THIS TIME.